Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Depression.


The whole deal about depression is that you have got to come out of it. There is no way you can stay depressed for too long. Reasons are:

One day of depression feels like a week of a vacation, same magnitude or more, but inversely proportional.
A very big drop in efficiency. You would hate to hire yourself if you saw what work you were doing.
Friends don’t deserve that attitude from you. That blah, I am fine, will tell you later, I will-work-my-way-out-of-this crap. No, hang out with them and cheer up anyway.
The madness in not knowing what lies ahead is an absolute killer. Mindeff happens, true story.

So one must get over it and do a lot of things to do so. To me, it’s a combination of a lot of things, because I am never happy with just one solution. A lot of back up plans have to be in place, so that depression doesn’t rear its ugly head. And if it already has, one has to get up and attack. I must always be prepared.

So on a day you choose to grab depression by its balls (yes, only men can be that much trouble, so depression is a man) and ask it to get out of your life, you have to begin really early in the day.

I try to be nice from the dawn itself. I wake up real early, also cos I cant get any sleep. I chant, do deep breathing and after an hour, I believe that things can be brought back to normalcy.

Be nice to everyone. Hear your mom out when she calls the maid a bitch for bunking yet again, hear out your dad when he tells you he thinks you are overspending on the weekends, hear out the hot aunty from the first floor when she says your hair would look much better with weekly mehendi. Everybody needs to speak and you are troubled enough with your own mind telling you a hundred things. So its better to hear other people talk, keeps you away from the hard work of doing so.

Eat everything you are given, and make sure you are eating healthy. Depression is a time when you feel everything is going wrong. So, atleast the food you eat should look healthy, like you will survive.

Go to the beauty parlour, get waxed, pampered. Yes, you might feel as if who are you doing it all for, like life is over, but you never know, you might just live through this. Its a chance you have to take. And just in case those amazing friends turn up to make you feel better, you dont want to look ugh.ly, nay?

The temple is a great way to feel better about yourself. As soon as you see those smirking idols, you feel a little revived, as if they will smirk but listen to you, eventually. You go and do the quintessential 'mattha tekna' and trust you me, there is HOPE. Just like that. After that, you feel ready to take on a little more than what was being dished out. (yeah, I know. Its like we move from one problem to the other, but then not talking about it wont make them vanish, is it?)

You need inspiration. I go for music, a lot of it. I listen to a lot of rock (the world go to hell types)to pop music (they are the safest) and eventually end up listening to that secret Jagjit Singh collection, weeping to my sleep. After all, no one understands better than Jagjit does.

The absolute must is the visit to the nearest Barista. Just the thought of a huge cup of coffee or hot chocolate with some soul curry with a friend or two, sigh. The fact that you can share the whole thing that bothers you over a cup in a couple of hours, that makes the issue at hand look smaller for a brief moment there, no? You must rant, ramble and drink. And binge on the choco chip muffins ofcourse. The only place calories help is in your miseries.

At the end of the day, you feel tired because you have done so much. You feel physically tired and mentally you are a little numb because while you havent allowed yourself with much space to think, the issue still nudges at the far corners of your heart and mind. Ofcourse, you still dont have the solution. But you know you have friends, you know you have technology and spirituality, you know people look over you, waiting for you to get better. And that thing we call H.O.P.E.

And a day has atleast passed, hasnt it?

pic courtesy: a beautiful revolution

6 comments:

The Sage said...

rock is anyday a good option... nice vent out...
my favorite depression bands are nirvana and pink floyd..
and how can you but not come out if you listen to..

We're just two lost souls swimming in a fish bowl, year after year,
Running over the same old ground.
What have we found? The same old fears.

Mrinalini said...

have missed venting out to you sage! and rock is complete fodder, though more satisfactory is 'crawling' on days like these (you know what i mean)
but will soon be buying a stairway to heaven :)

The Sage said...

i told you so!! still it is not too late!! am still available!! :P

Anonymous said...

100% complete unadulterated truth and one of my fav posts! except u forgot to mention chocolates and F.R.I.E.N.D.S or maybe thats just my weapon :P Also if u happen to be slightly (im being modest of course!) psychotic, u cn have conversations with urself. not like the sorting-it-out-in-ur-head type, more like being 2 people at the same time - one u and the other the person responsible for ur depression. weird, but works for me sometimes.

Mrinalini said...

@Sage, its never too late, i agree :P

@Anonymous, you sound like a very dear friend, or are you? :O
yes i forgot chocolates, it spreads a kind of warmth around u :)
and i do have conversations in my head, plenty of 'em actually :)

Beauty and the BEast said...

I like the bit which clearly says 'depression has to be a man' !! Love it, in fact :P

And love your attitude towards depressive days.. beats mooning around all day long, any day!!

 

Copyright 2009 The Pretty Four All rights reserved. Banner Design by tiffinbox.