Sunday, July 19, 2009

Letter of complaint to THE manufacturer

To THE Manufacturer,
Heaven Villa
Next to Pearly Gates
Opposite hell

Sub: Defected pieces being circulated, please take curative measures ASAP!

Respected Mr. G,
This is to bring to your notice that your product-Men- are causing great trouble, anxiety and much pain in our lives down here. On purchase no prior warnings were issued at the back of it, also, no user manual was handed for the proper functioning of this product. This has created a lot of havoc in *‘our’ lives and we would request you to help us deal with this problem in the best possible way.

The product has the following defects:
• Is clueless
• Needs regular oiling
• Is slow and takes a lot of time to start functioning
• Produces foul smell periodically
• No number of kicks forces ‘it’ to work… is stubborn and moody….if I may add.
• The product lives under a perpetual impression of being Sovereign
• No amount of ‘our’ understanding helps it to become better

After reading the aforementioned issues, I’m hoping you will realize that women don’t complain out of habit- we are just painfully confused!

The problem does exist; however, we would like to give you a chance to rectify the “item” since you have in the past created some excellent quality products- US! And because we respect your abilities and capabilities, we would like to give some suggestions to speed up the process:
1. User manual is a MUST!- it will help us to deal with the problem effectively- page by page.
2. Warning signs ( such as; Suicidal Tendencies, Mama’s Boy, Woman in a Man’s Body, Simply Stupid, Beyond Improvement, Infidel, Born Brain Dead, No Scope, Awful Humor, Idolizes Salman Khan- Himesh Reshammiya and the likes, Multiple Flirting Disorder, Thinks ‘elevate’ is cool! Etc etc) should be printed in caps- preferably on the Forehead!
Mr G, I feel these 2 points will be enough to take care of the situation down here. If you incorporate these points while manufacturing the product it will really simplify all ‘our’ lives.

Hoping to see some positive results soon!

Yours Sincerely
Puzzled Women!

P.S: Don’t fret over the products already manufactured; we’ll try coming up with some permanent solutions! However, your guidance and suggestions shall always be welcome.

* ‘Our’- refers to the collectively confused community of countless women

ASSUMPTION and DISCLAIMER: Girls, you WILL enjoy the post. Guys, please to take in good humours. Ok? Ok. Many thanks.


Astha said...

that was awesome pia!very insightful! i sure hope mr G is listenin n doin sumthin bout it!!

Mrinalini said...

Piya, you have rocked this piece! Just how much are you flustered currently? share share :P
PS:We dont mean all boys, we mean just a few shady ones! Please understand :)

Blowfish said...

hahaha...........Great ya


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