Friday, July 25, 2008

Vague plays and silly classmates

It’s a Sunday and we are in India Habitat Centre to watch a play based on Gabriel Gracia Marquez’s story organized by the Columbian Embassy. We wonder around looking for the Stein Auditorium. My father exclaims like a five year old- “Look fish!” Ma and me look towards where dad is pointing. There is a man made pond sitting right in the middle of the plush green lawns of Habitat. Water lilies are floating and some strange orange fish are swimming around. We stand and watch for a few minutes and move on. We are finally able to locate the auditorium and enter the lobby to find lot of page three ‘arty’ people all huddled in small groups and talking with this solemn look on their face. My parents and I look and feel extremely lost because usually at such gatherings my hyper active social parents always do bump into some one known. And me….well lets not talk about my social skills here. Not in this post, maybe later.

The show starts half an hour late. A pretty Colombian girl gives the welcome address in broken and heavily accented English. We are informed that we all are here to celebrate Columbian national day. Someone from the corner starts clapping after hearing that. Err…whats there to clap?? It’s the national day dude! Or is he encouraging the girl with broken English on the stage? She clearly appears to be nervous. Ya, maybe that. The girl repeats what she said in English once again in Spanish. Then the ambassador addresses the audience.

Finally the play starts. Five women dressed in Rajasthani gypsy outfits enter the stage. Their faces are painted white. Just like the mime artists. All of them look the same. Spanish music starts playing in the background and the women start dancing. It continues for a good two minutes. Suddenly another woman enters wearing a hideous wig and white paint on her face and makes strange sounds. Ma and I exchange looks. Dad looks bewildered. “Was that Spanish?” I ask ma. Ma doesn’t reply and continues to look at the actors. Ok, maybe not I think, “What language is the play in, ma?” “English I think” Ma replies but doesn’t seem too sure. We spot Seema aunty who is one of the actors on the stage and the reason why we are watching the play. And suddenly the woman with the hideous wig starts speaking in Rajasthani Hindi. Yes, not English. Not even Hindi but Rajasthani Hindi. Above the stage, we notice, an electronic board, which is providing English sub-titles. Yes! A play in strange Hindi with English sub-titles. And I chuckle….loudly!

15 minutes into the play and I am still giggling. It’s an odd play. Forgive my ignorance towards abstract modern plays but I can’t digest five people playing the same character at the same time. I look at my dad. He is clearly reading the sub- titles and not really watching the play. My mom has the look that says if-I-meet-any-of-the-actors-outside-and-recognise-them-I-will-surely-kill-them. After an hour mom declares “I can’t watch this anymore! Let’s go.” My dad is in favour of it too. So the Roys walk out. Eat at Etopia and head back home. On our way back home Seema Aunty calls on Ma’s cell. I can hear her saying “It was so good! I mean …different but very good! It was abstract, and some of it went above my head! But overall really good!” I laugh sitting at the backseat. Poor ma. Trying to be as tactful as possible, which is not really her forte.

It’s a Monday morning and I’m at work. Getting the blues. Gtalk is on. Pia is telling me about the dresses she bought over the weekend.

Pia: u must go thr….Take mrinu with u na
Anjali: Yeah…lets see, don’t have money though
Pia: baby, everything is on sale. U’ll get stuff thr sasta

My boss enters the bay. I quickly close the chat window and pretend to be busy. I look through a fashion site and pretend to read it intensely (the look that I have mastered by now). He looks at me, thinks of saying something and then walks off. Aah! Close! I realize it’s almost 11 and I haven’t started working. Shit! I should now….before the boss comes back and says something. I am deep into work (for a change) when suddenly a gtalk window pops up on the right side of the screen.

Mihir: Hi there.

Mihir!!?? My classmate from school? Why is he IM-ing…we don’t even talk? I keep looking at the window for couple of seconds, thinking what to do. Should or should I not answer back? I don’t even remember the last time I spoke to him. Not even in school. So why is he IM-ing me? I think hard (oh god! Such a life changing decision!) and eventually reply with a “hi”.

Mihir: So wats up?

Shit! Why did I reply? Now we both will have this random conversation and I’ll keep wondering what exactly is the point. I used to dislike him in school. I don’t know why though….actually I don’t remember.

Anjali: Nothing much…..
Mihir: Saw the dark knight?
Anjali: nope, want to though. Badly, u?
Mihir: yeah..loved the joker..worth another watch
Anjali: Hmm
Mihir: May I know what u do?

Chivalry and all huh….not bad

Anjali: lol, yes u may
i am working
what u doing now?
Mihir: am waiting for an interview result at the Indian statistical institute..for a joint research fellowship.. might start working otherwise..

Deep!

Anjali: oh nice
Mihir: oh..so u are at work!sorry!

Yes finally u get it!!U daft!!

Anjali: no no its ok (why am I being so polite?)
am guessing ur at home?
Mihir: yeah..ve been for last five years! i mean stayin atleast

err…. I just meant right now…whats with him?

Mihir:Whers ur office
Anjali: gurgaon
Mihir: ok.. where do u stay?
Anjali: a place called Dwarka, heard of it?
Mihir: yeah yeah,,got a flat in phase 2 sector 11 i thnk
u?
me: sector 6
Mihir: ok..no i mean its still not ready ...how ur place,,,developed now..is dwarka?
Anjali: very, my apartment is on the main road, market is close....

I feel like a property dealer

Mihir: ok..hey.. do u have any idea about any research inst for economics research in gurgaon… I know that ICRA is there

What!!!

Anjali: err...no mihir

My phone rings, it’s my boss. He wants me to come to his desk. I go. He discusses new projects, gives me pile of work and asks “Any problems?” I want to scream “Yes!! You!” but I say predictably a “no”. After half an hour I come back to my desk only to find Mihir still chatting.

Mihir: ok..where do u stay?
Anjali: Dwarka

Didn’t I already mention it??

Mihir: oh ya!

Tubelight!!

Mihir: when do u generally go out and where?
Mihir: (i feel like an interrogator)

Finally he gets it!!

I mean any place in dwarka to hang out
Anjali: all my friends are in south delhi, so I usually 'hang out' there
Mihir: hey...if i remmber correctly.. i think we were captain n vice captain for shravan house.. and its a little late but I must make a confession
Anjali: ?
Mihir: i thot u did most of the work! and u deserved to b the captain n not me!
but its been long now i guess..

Yes now I remember why I disliked him! We were house captains in junior school and he never used to work! Bloody hell! The confession came too late!

It’s one. And my stomach is talking. My team mates and I go to the cafeteria for lunch. I come back after an hour only to find Mihir still online and conversing with me…

Mihir: hey.. u there?
Mihir: yoohooo
Anjali: err...sorry, had gone for lunch
Mihir: k..mine didnt take long

Good for you!

Mihir: hey..can i ask u smthn personal
Anjali: depends ......whats the question?
Mihir: are in favor of being asked out for a date?
hey..sorry if that was too much..
Anjali: i didnt get u
what?

WTF!!??

Mihir: well,, i was wondering if u wud like to meet up sometime?
ok..m gettin a feelin that u're not up for it..so sorry!

SHIT!! So this is what it was huh?? He wanted to ask me out on date. What do I say?!

I ignore him for sometime, while Mihir continues to apologise and ask me out in the same breath. Finally after a good 10 minutes I reply

Anjali: sorry, wasnt thr at my desk
Mihir: so? did u see my question,,
Anjali: yes i did
Mihir: ok.. so are u thinkin abt it?

Yes I am thinking. I’m thinking how to hit you!Stupid moron , you speak to me after ages and you ask me out on a date?? Like really?? What are u thinking dude?

Anjali: Mihir my boss is sitting right here....can I talk to u later?

Boss has gone out! ha ha! But he doesn’t need to know that

Mihir: ok..sorry
Anjali: not a problem.will talk later
Mihir: hi..ok,
can we talk
err…what were we doing till now…dancing??
or mail if u want to..

I sign out without replying.

6 comments:

Nandini said...

You know what, we should have a post on the do's and dont's of date asking! And morons who ask you out over gtalk should be slapped! Really.

Anjali said...

i like the idea ;)

Piya said...

yup agreed....all shady characters should be slapped in public...or better, should kiss the overgrown-ugly-annoying-disgusting-purple haired monster.. how do they do it howwwwwww??? ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwww:D

Anonymous said...

That was faannnneey..:) and i totally agree with nandini... It wud b fun to meet up with him jus to giv him one zor ka chammat.. :)Jus imagine the guy's expression ...lol...

The Binocular said...

well.. nice to read abt ya experience on d modern day "columbian/indian/watsoever" play wid english subtitles.. :D
n yup good that u have IM access in ur office, for some kinda timepass.. n to catch up such wierd old classmates..
ya mite even come across sum guy via IM, pretending to b ur classmate in ya last birth... ;))..
n yup.. d conversation wud b as funny as here.. keep writing.. :)
n keep getting more such IMs to share.. :P...

JB said...

I really cant beleive it...... The entire chat is here with special effects....oh god....

Roys ?????? HAHQAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! i cant stop laughing :) :) :) :) :)

But the Columbiam play would have also had special effects if it would have had Bheeshon Bhalo!!!!(If my spel is right;) )

Guys u rock... love it absolutely....btw anjali it was as good a description as on the phone...well do.... kUDOS

 

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